Various confessions

I entertained the notion of starting up an LJ for my meandering thoughts, but I realized that I really don't know what to say, nor would I keep up with it.

And really, I'd only be doing it for the attention whoring and the hopes of being discovered by a clothing website...leading to, perhaps, getting free clothing from them? Hint-HINT internet gods...

So, first confession is, I suppose, I wish I could be an internet celebrity. Then I'd get free things. And free is always good.

Since free hardly ever happens though, I have a job. Two actually. Both of which will go to my furthering of body mod-ing and revamping of my wardrobe. Because it's not enough to simply enough to have black clothing. All goths wear black, but is the inverse true? No. In fact, not all goths wear black. I do though. Because it looks slimming. And I have body issues.

Speaking of which, I'm working on loosing weight (again) and for further motivation I've decided to not get any more body mods (not even sizing up my gages) until I loose 10-15lbs. Probably 10, 'cause I really want a fucking tattoo. And perhaps a belly button piercing. Or a tongue piercing. Whatever. Moar piercings.

For the first time in my life, I'll have money for a good corset. What the hell am I going to do with myself? I'll be flustered for weeks...

In any event another confession: I wish I was smaller. I often feel small, and wish to be a shadow. Then I could just listen and observe people, make notes, and act appropriately when the time comes. What does this have to do with clothes (as that seems to be the main focus of this entry)? If I were small, I could fit more Japanese clothing. Or I could be Sam. She's so fucking adorable...holy shit...even more so with the purple hair. I wish MY hair would do that....but I look terrible blond-ish.

Anyway >__> small=more clothes. Sam=small. Thus Sam=more clothes. Win win. Sam, I'm taking over your body.

Next confession: I can waste hours and hours of time looking at clothes on ebay and longing for the money to have such wonderful things. I have a wishlist of about...153 tab of lolita dresses, jackets and shoes; 20 for socks; and 22 tabs of random other clothes that I find awesome. What has my life become? *whistful sigh*

I want to wear makeup more, but I really don't have time in the morning. Unless I want to wake up an hour earlier...then I'd be a bitch the rest of the day. Not worth it. Also, since most if not all goth make up (and hair for that matter) tips are for those of a paler complexion than mine, my makeup styles are more of an experiment than a fool proof method. So I'd need time to mess up and not look like an idiot. A weekend perhaps. But weekends are full of homework...